Hey Yoga I want my ZEN back

My intentions were set early this morning.


I woke up with a happy heart and a date with my yoga mat.


I’ll admit it, my yoga practice is less of a deep practice of self discovery and meditation and more like a jersey shore relationship.. you know, On and Off ALL TIME!


I’m sure that if I practiced more regularly I might be able to describe my practice to you differently, and so the reason I DO go to the odd yoga class is because I have given in to the desire to have that incredible self discovery, learn the stillness I need to meditate and really to find my ZEN.


It’s a hot yoga class, that I am going to, so I spend some time really planning out what outfit is best. I know that its hot as hell and most women are in itty bitty shorts and a sports bra. Well I can tell you that even as a personal trainer and bikini athlete, I am not one to just hang out in a room of people in my undies… So I settle on capris and a baggy tank top.

I grab my water, my towel, my mat and my car keys, I’m about to get my zen on.


I like to get to class at least 10 minutes before it starts to acclimate to the heat and calm my mind.

I walk in, the immediate wall of steamy yoga air welcomes me as I close the door behind me and find my spot. I always find myself close to the wall, centre of the class on the left. It’s my spot, regardless of studio.

I lay my mat down, stand facing the mirror, reach my arms up overhead, clasp my hands together, give myself a smile ( “This is going to be a beautiful class Kyla I’m so happy I came to class, I feel better already”) I bend gently side to side and then hinge forward, placing my hands on the mat by my feet to allow my back body to relax and then I find my way to my back on the mat and begin slowing my mind and focusing on my breath.


This all sounds lovely, doesn’t it?

It feels lovely too…


But you see, this is where everything changes.


The quiet of the room is interrupted about every 5-10 seconds with the door swinging open and the outside voices echoing in.

Sticky footprints through the room as the yogis find their spot and slap their mats to the floor.

It’s hard to find any stillness when everything around you is stirring.
Again, I realize that the more I practice, the easier this will get…

But for us newbies, I’m just saying, it’s challenging.


My instructor enters the room and begins speaking. She has a beautiful voice and speaks calmly to slowly bring our attention out of where it currently is and into her instructions. She asks us all to gently roll to our right side and slowly find our way to our feet at the top of the mat.


HOLY SHIT how is there 65 people in here!!!!!!!”


Yes, that is my first thought as I stand up and see the see of bodies no more than a foot apart from the next.

This is where my issues lay. How on earth are you supposed to still your mind, breath into your intentions and find your Zen when you’ve got somebody elses sweat dripping on you as their flayling arm or leg falls out of a posture and into your space?


And let’s be honest, you can’t even see yourself in the mirror if you DID want to focus on your alignent, because unless you are face planting the mirror in the first row, all you can see is the brand of underwear the person in front of you is wearing.


I get that a business is a business and it needs to make money.

If they limited class sizes to 10, yes we, or I at least would likely have more success remaining calm and in the moment of my practice.

However the studio would have to charge quadrouple the amount in order to make any money, and thusly, nobody would go.

I don’t have any suggestions with this story, I just wanted to share my thoughts, because I feel confident I am not alone, and, well I thought it was funny


I love the idea of yoga, and I understad that yes there are many different versions of yoga, and I am limiting my story to hot yoga, and so by no means do I think all classes are the same.


I highly suggest that everybody TRY at the very least a few classes. Try a variety of styles and find what feels right for you.

I am on a continued journey to finding MY Zen…. I invite you to join me.

~NAMASTE, all 65 of you;)


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